FIGHT! FIGHT! Shalik & Cogs are having a FIGHT!

There I was, driving down the highway, when lo and behold, the voices in my head got into a donnybrook. It seems that Constance—

*KICK*

—ow!—I mean Cogs is incensed that Shalik is taking up altogether too much of my time as of late. She was my Golden Child until the Sherpa Holmes story took off...

"Oy, chica!"

"I do beg your pardon! But are you addressing me?"

"I don't see any other Latinas floating around, do you?"

"I am not a Latina."

"My apologies. Oy, squaw!"

"I am not a squaw, either."

"Then what are you?"

"Indian."

Cogs sighed and rolled her eyes. "That brings us back to, Oy, squaw!"

"Wrong type of Indian. I am from the Indian subcontinent—more commonly referred to by the Empire as the Raj."

"Well, la-de-dah!"

"I am quite sure that I do not need to be spoken to quite so rudely by a child."

"I am quite sure that you do. My story was going along marvelously until you showed up."

"Such an impudent little trollop! I believe if you continue being this rude to me, I shall be forced to take you across my knee and give you a sound thrashing!"

"You and what bloody army?"

"Why you impudent, little—"

"Shush! Whatever you are, you're hogging my limelight. You will cease. Now!"

"I am sorry, but I refuse to stand here to be harassed by a waif. Good day!" Shalik turned to stalk off. It was at this point that Cogs cocked back her arm and punched Shalik squarely in the nose. From there it quickly degraded into a full blown battle. Shalik may have been trained in hand-to-hand combat, but Cog's street smarts gave her enough of an edge that the fight was fairly even.

Meanwhile, as the two women pummeled one another in an effort to regain my attention as primary character, a group of men in full combat kit huddled off to one side. Alpha Company, (3-201st, 86th Airborne, Terran Confederate Army, "You point it out, we'll take it out!") sat in a small circle watching the proceedings as they ate their Rapid Heat Meals (spoken aloud as "Rahems"), pondering the fisticuffs.

"Sarge, should we intervene?"

Sergeant Baines glared at the PFC. "Who you gonna hit first? The lady, or the little girl?"

"I . . . uh . . . neither?"

"Right, moron. Besides, you know the LZ we're going into is hot. You in a hurry to get there?"

"Uh, no."

"Then shut your pie hole and do something useful, like sharpen your knife."

The PFC took his k-bar out and began to drag it back and forth over a whetstone.

It's never dull inside my noggin...

h0w 2 rite

Since it has come to light that I am an author, I've been asked by many friends, "Oh, cool! You're a writer. I've been thinking about writing a book. Got any tips on how to do it?"

Why, yes--yes I do. But you're not going to like them.

Tip #1: You must write.

Tip #2: Don't worry about your spelling, your grammar, your punctuation, or anything else as you write along. You'll fix all of that when you rewrite. Right now, ignore your run-on sentences. Split your infinitives. Let your participles dangle out there for all the world to see. (It is usually at this point when I mention run-on sentences, infinitives, and participles that most people's eyes glaze over, and they decide that they might be better off going into a more honest line of work, such as politics, or bank robbing.) In the meantime, you must write.

Tip #3: Do not even worry about naming that character you just brought in. I have lots of rough drafts where my latest minor character is introduced as Josephine Schmuckatelli. For now, you must write.

Tip #4: That whizz-bang gizmo you just gave your characters to use in their daring escape? Never mind how it works, or what it's called. "Josephine pulled out her [INSERT TECHNO-BABBLE HERE] and fried the IRS Agent's head clean off." Fix it in the rewrite. Right now, you must write.

Tip #5: If you get an idea about something, get it down on paper instantly. Do not put it off to do research. Research can come later. Get the concept down before you lose it. You can go back and backfill any continuity problems that arise from this new idea on the rewrite. For now, you must write.

Tip #6: Turn off your chat programs. Turn off Facebook. Turn off Weatherbug, or whatever weather alert program you have. I don't care if you live in Tornado Alley. So do I. YOU MUST WRITE!

Tip #7: Okay, so getting the cat to stop licking your ear, or trying to sit in your lap while you're writing is an impossibility. Adapt and overcome. I can type with one hand--either side. If I can do it, so can you. YOU MUST WRITE!

Now, for the final three--and most critical tips. In order of importance, I present to you, tips 8, 9, and 10.

Tip #8: YOU MUST WRITE!

Tip #9: YOU MUST WRITE!

Tip #10: YOU MUST WRITE!

And there you have it. It's that simple. Worry about the nuts and bolts later on. Get a good editor--later on. Get a cover--later on. Format it for submitting--later on. Right now? Right now you are going get out there and write until you have no letters left on your keyboard!

Ignore these rules at your own peril. That most foul of monsters, the Doldrums, is waiting to take your Work in Progress to the Land of Unfinished Pieces. Your best sword to slay this monster is the Pen...or Pencil, or Keyboard--maybe even a quill! Heck, use a Crayon! But, WRITE!

Writer's Block

So I reached a point in my novel where I knew I had to go from point A to point B. And I had no idea how to segue. I had opened my WiP day after day—and nothing happened. I fiddled with the wording in some of the previous pages, tightening stuff up here, expounding on stuff there. But I still had a wall that was keeping me from continuing on with it.

OH NO! I had Writer's Block! That dreaded malady that puts terror in just about any writer. I went to multiple sites that spoke on how to get past the block. I tried dozens of tips and tricks—to no avail. I still had a mental block that was keeping me from moving forward on my novel.

So I took it on the road with me when I went to work. Every day as I drove down the highways I'd let my mind wander a bit and hope that some spark would jump me over that block. Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into a month. I was starting to think I might have to shelf this piece, and go fiddle with something else. Speaking of fiddling, my Bostrom Air Ride Seat in the truck wasn't quite right. So I reached down to fiddle with the switch to adjust the height to where I needed it. Great. It got stuck in the full up position and—*BAM* I hit a seam in the road from one county to the next and jammed my head into the ceiling of the cab.

The words began to flow. No, not profanities—new words. For my novel! New ideas! A smooth transition from where I was, to where I wanted to go! YES! I was past the block!

So the next time you have a bad case of writer's block, try this: Get in a 80,000 lb concrete truck, run it up to 65mph, and jack your seat all the way up so when you hit a bump you slam your head into the ceiling! Hey, if it worked for me, it just might work for you! Maybe...

0.o

Vocabulary

I've been playing with Vocabulary.com trying to improve my vocabulary. Why? Because I like words, and I enjoy learning new ones.

The following words have continued to bollix me:

inchoate
encomium
eleemosynary
prorogue
orison

While I have been expanding my vocabulary, I had to pause to think--are these words anything that I will ever have a need to use, in either my writing, or in my daily speech?

Then I went into the Vocabulary.com's Top 100 Words that other users are having problems with:

consider
minute
accord
evident
practice
intend

...and I realized that if these words are typical of what this country is having difficulties with, the American populace, taken as a whole, is ignorant and stupid.

But whose fault is it? Is it their own fault? Are they lazy? (lolwut?) Is it the fault of the schools? The fault of media that writes down to them on an eight-grade level? Or is it the fault of the authors for not learning words such as eleemosynary, and using them, thusly forcing our readers to break open their dictionaries (or, as in most cases, run out and purchase one)?

*peering down*

HEY! How'd I get up on this soapbox? -.-

Plugging Away

It has been a very productive week for my writing. I was late crew at my day job all week long, and had quite a few short days. As such, I was able to get thousands of words written on the two works I've been plugging away at: Sherpa Holmes, and Airship Follies. Both are Steampunk. Sherpa is a standalone alternate history work that has almost reached novella length (and will by the time I am done with it). Not quite sure how long Airship will go--it started off as a short-short and ballooned on me. That one is set in my Aeropæia world, the same as Tunk (from Will Write SciFi for Food, Too).

I had two major storyline problems I dealt with in Sherpa yesterday. Fixed them both, but created a new continuity problem that needs to be dealt with. Even with that, I still managed to get over 2,000 words written on it. I don't remember how many words I managed to get written on Airship during the past week--it was a case of 200 here, 700 there. I believe, when totaled up, it came to more or less an additional 2,000 words on that piece as well.

I intended to write more today, but after I made that scrumptious lunch (spaghetti carbonara) I had a severe case of the doldrums. But the time I worked past that, it as time to start dinner. We grilled some moist chicken out on the grill, and we had that plus some fancy cheeses my son made a platter out of. Again, writing was not to happen.

I probably should be working on either of the stories now--and yet, here I am, playing with my blog. Meh.

No, I don't see any productive writing happening tonight. I see a shower, and the reading of a good book happening. With that said, I'll leave you with a link to one of my cats. I caught her in that cat trap she's hanging out of.

Cat-trap

New Book!

Did I mention that I have a new books out? No, I didn't. Why? Because I neglect my blog.

So . . . I have this new book out called Phobos. It's slightly SciFi, slightly fantasy, slightly a thriller, and slightly paranormal.

So trot out to your local eBook store and grab a copy for your particular flavor of e-reader device today!

Phobos for Kindle

Phobos for Nook

Phobos for Everything Else

And don't forget to grab my other books if you don't own them already!

Indie Author's Starter Kit

So I have a friend who has decided that she is going to write a book. Mazel tov! I hope she does it. It's a lot of work. Trust me, I know. I have two anthologies and two shorts out in publication now. My three, full length novels are still in work. I keep plugging away at them as life allows. Alas, life keeps getting in the way of my creativity and writing.

But that's not what I came here to talk about. Nope. I went through all my writing links and dug them out for her, weeding out the 404 URLs so every link she'd click on would work.

Then, after I sent them to her, I tossed the list in one of my editor's laps and said, "Here, an Indie Author Starter Kit. Everything the budding author will need to beginning writing and editing their book. You're on your own for publishing links."

And y'know what? It's a good deal. So here, for all my own fans is my Indie Author's Starter Kit. My suggestion is to spend 2x the amount of time writing as you do reading all the excellent information in these links. So for every hour you spend learning the craft by reading, you need to spend TWO hours writing and practicing the craft. Because the best way to get better at the writing craft is to write, write, write.

I'm being lazy and not making these active hyperlinks. Cut'n'paste, baby, Cut'n'paste. :D

http://download.openoffice.fm/free/

http://dictionary.reference.com/

http://www.bartleby.com/141/

http://grammatic-effects.com/

http://www.facebook.com/GrammaticEffects

http://www.dailywritingtips.com/

http://www.phrases.org.uk/index.html

http://www.thecreativepenn.com/

http://www.how-to-write-a-book-now.com/index.html

http://www.refdesk.com/index.html

http://litreactor.com/essays/36-writing-essays-by-chuck-palahniuk

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Latin_phrases_%28full%29

http://www.fracturedhorizonnovel.com/2011/05/02/a-simple-novel-outline-9-questions-for-25-chapters/ http://www.writing-world.com/index.shtml

http://www.creative-writing-now.com/index.html

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/psychology-writers

http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2011/06/07/25-things-you-should-know-about-character/

http://www.smashingmagazine.com/2009/06/28/50-free-resources-that-will-improve-your-writing-skills/

http://truthmafia.com/archives/6957

http://www.writersdigest.com/writing-articles/by-writing-level/havent-written-anything-yet

http://www.caroclarke.com/fourfaults.html

http://writing-for-beginners.blogspot.com/

http://www.advancedfictionwriting.com/

http://www.campaignmastery.com/blog/40-great-name-resources-lists-and-generators/

I've written a guest post for the Must Read Mysteries blog. Check it out.

Coupon!

Been thinking of checking out Will Write SciFi For Food, Too but didn't want to spend $1.99?  Well, then--I have some good news for you!  In celebration of the one year anniversary of WWSFFF1 I'm offering a 50% coupon for it on Smashwords.  Just use coupon code, PC67U.  (Coupon is good for one week.)

Anniversary!

I just realized--yesterday was the ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY of my first book, Will Write SciFi For Food coming out!

Well, la-te-da!

Once again I prove I am an infrequent blogger.  Will Write SciFi For food, Too has been out now since January 22 for the Kindle and the Nook.  I've also finished Toys in the Attic, and it is available on Smashwords for FREE!

I've gone back to working hard on Sherpa Holmes.  I've gotten her cover completed (and if you have a Twitter account, you can see her here.  You can also follow me on Twitter @WWSFFF)  I managed to crank out 2100 words on her, putting her at over 11k words total so far (and I'm still building).

So keep checking back!  I might actually post up when I finish the book--or several months thereafter.

Finished!

I finally finished Tunk, the last story for Will Write SciFi For Food, Too and sent him off to my editors last night. Woke up today with a wondrous headache and stayed home from work.  I started working on a new story (just a short--I think) called Toys in the Attic.  No hints.  You'll just have to wait and see.

I hope to get Tunk back and start assembling WWSFFF2 some time in the coming week.  I still have to go get a new pic for the cover.  I wish I had taken one during our last snowfall--but hindsight, y'know?

In the meantime, you can still follow me on Twitter @WWSFFF.

Peace out.

Book Split

I've come to a decision about including the Steampunk story Sherpa Holmes in my upcoming Will Write SciFi For Food, Too.

It ain't a-gonna happen.  There are a couple reasons behind this.

First, with how much I have already written on the piece, plus the copious notes I have yet to incorporate into the story, it is going to hit novella length, if not full novel length.

Second, the piece deals with some fairly rough topics--among them warfare, war crimes, civilian casualties, and generally man's inhumanity against others.  It has already pushed past the limits of the self-imposed PG rating I am trying to keep on WWSFFF2.

So briefly I will be putting Doctor Shalik Chandela-Holmes' story on a back burner while I break one of my other rough drafts out of the barn and bring it up to full RPM in order to finish off WWSFFF2 and get the book released.

Don't worry--her tale will not stay there very long.  She is a very headstrong woman with a lot to say.  She's already taken over the story.  No, I mean it.  She's writing it now.  I'm just along for the ride.

Shalom out.